Whether at home with your family, work with colleagues, out with friends, or running errands in a store full of strangers, you are constantly communicating. Your words, body language, tone of voice, gestures, and even what you write in a text message are all forms of communication, and during these interactions, you’re constantly putting to use interpersonal communication skills. Developing and perfecting your interpersonal communication skills makes your ability to communicate better, more effective, and positive. Whether you’re communicating face-to-face, over the phone, or through email or another device, improving your interpersonal communication is an important part of these interactions. Read on to learn more about interpersonal communication, what interpersonal skills are (including examples), and how to improve them. What is interpersonal communication? Interpersonal communication is communication between people. This can happen in three ways: * Verbal communication is when we use spoken words to convey a message, such as during a conversation, speech, or talking on the phone. * Written communication is communicating via written form, such as through letters, emails, text messages, reports, memos, etc. * Non-verbal communication is how you communicate through your movements, looks, and reactions, including facial expressions, gestures, body language, and touch. Interpersonal skills are important because they help you be more effective at communicating your messages, thoughts, and feelings to others, not only in your day-to-day life with friends, family, and strangers, but also at the workplace. What are interpersonal communication skills Interpersonal communication skills are the traits you use when communicating with others. Also called people skills or social skills, they help you navigate written, verbal, and non-verbal communication situations with others. Good interpersonal communication and working to improve your interpersonal communication skills can be key in helping with conflict resolution, listening skills, and your overall ability to communicate effectively. Examples of interpersonal communication skills Interpersonal communication skills are considered “soft” skills, meaning they are easily transferable across situations. Here are a few examples of the top interpersonal communication skills that are most valuable, especially in the workplace: Active listening Active listening is more than just listening to the words someone says. When actively listening, you’re consciously listening, analyzing, and responding to another person, focusing on the intent and content of their words and providing appropriate feedback. Actively listening to another person shows engagement in a positive way and mutual understanding of the conversation. Leadership A great leader sets direction, inspires others and helps create something new. Leaders are influencers, using their roles to help motivate others to achieve their goals. They also help motivate others to use and improve their skills and rally behind a vision. Being a great leader involves decision-making, as well as many other interpersonal communication skills, and can be embodied by both managers and individual team members. Emotional intelligence Also known as empathy, a person’s emotional intelligence is how well they understand the needs, thoughts, and feelings of others. It allows someone to feel what another person is experiencing from their point of view, but it also gives one the ability to place themselves in that person’s shoes. This skill helps you be more understanding, aware, and sensitive to the thoughts and feelings of those around you. Teamwork Teamwork is another skill that embodies multiple other skills. The ability to work well as a team is essential, especially in the workplace, and team players are often seen as ones who can handle more critical tasks or even promotions. Problem solving Solving problems and resolving conflict can become easier when you put your skills to work. These particular skills could include active listening, negotiation, leadership, and others. Listening carefully, understanding the situation from everyone’s side, and working together to find a solution can create a positive outcome and environment. Other skills Other interpersonal skills you may want to improve include: * Motivation - the ability to inspire and motivate others * Negotiation - the ability to help two sides reach a compromise * Assertiveness - the ability to stand up for yourself or others in a calm, positive way * Decision making - the ability to gather information, make choices, and assess alternate resolutions * Responsibility - the ability to be accountable, act independently and make responsible decisions * Patience - the ability to tolerate and remain calm in frustrating or adverse situations * Dependability - being trustworthy and reliable, doing what you say you will when you say you will * Flexibility - willingness to change, compromise or modify * Positive - being optimistic about situations, interactions, and yourself * Resourceful - the ability to find quick ways to overcome difficult situations * Supportive - providing encouragement or emotional assistance * Collaborative - the ability to work well with others * Adaptable - the ability to adjust and modify to new conditions * Awareness - having concern, information, and interest in a particular situation * Encouraging - the ability to give someone support, confidence, hope, and sharing positivity * Respectful - showing respect to others regardless of the situation Why are interpersonal communication skills important? Interpersonal communication skills are important to help you see others’ points of view, resolve conflict, listen, and communicate effectively. Not only do they play a role in day-to-day life, but they are critical in the workplace. Improving your interpersonal communication skills can help you be more successful and collaborative and have an overall positive attitude about your interactions with others. These skills can help you solve problems more efficiently and effectively, make sound and informed decisions, and support others around you. How to improve interpersonal communication skills Whether you already possess some of the interpersonal communication skills listed above and are looking to improve them, or there are a few you need extra work on, there are ways to improve your skills and become more effective at communicating. Start with just being more self-aware: * Whenever you’re communicating with anyone, pay attention to your behavior and words and how others interact with you and react to you. * Take time to reflect on how you communicate with others in different situations. * Think about how you could have reacted differently or more effectively, either by saying things differently, adjusting your body language, or more actively listening. * Try recording yourself when speaking, either with a voice or video recorder, to watch or listen back and note things you’d like to change. Other things you can do include: * Attend workshops or take online classes that are tailored to practicing and building interpersonal skills. These classes are tailored to teaching real-work skills, providing examples, and allowing you to practice and apply what you learn. * Ask a friend or colleague for feedback. Those you communicate with regularly are the best to provide constructive criticism on your skill level and offer examples of how you can improve. * Find a mentor you trust and respect who can help you improve your skills. Working with someone who already excels at communication can be a great way to learn. * Observe others, especially during positive communication interactions. Learn from others and how they communicate, and be thoughtful about how the situations could be improved or how you can apply the qualities in your interactions. Note specific details like the words they use, their body language, tone of voice, and how they engage with others. * Put your phone away and avoid distractions when communicating or interacting with others. By giving them your full attention, you can stay focused and listen more attentively. * Practice. Give speeches or presentations or lead meetings at work—practice active listening with family, friends, and coworkers. Be more conversational with colleagues or even strangers you meet. Any time you have the opportunity to practice your communication skills, do so.
We are constantly communicating. For example, the average professional spends about 28% of their work day [https://hbr.org/2019/01/how-to-spend-way-less-time-on-email-every-day] reading and answering email, checking email 15 times per day or more. It’s estimated that executives can be in meetings for up to 23 hours per week [https://www.inc.com/david-finkel/we-are-not-meant-to-sit-in-zoom-meetings-for-hours-at-a-time.html] . In 2020, Microsoft Teams reached 115 million daily active users [https://www.microsoft.com/en-us/microsoft-365/blog/2020/10/28/microsoft-teams-reaches-115-million-dau-plus-a-new-daily-collaboration-minutes-metric-for-microsoft-365/] , sending millions of chats per day. Between the communications we consume and the messages we share ourselves, it seems we are sometimes on communication overload. The question is, how effective are those communications? Are they always understood? Do they meet the goal of the message? Do they help improve and maintain relationships, or the opposite? Interpersonal communication skills are a critical part of daily life. Here is more information about what those skills are, why they are important for the workplace, and how to improve them. What is interpersonal communication? Simply put, interpersonal communication is communication between people. There are essentially three forms of interpersonal communication: verbal, written, or non-verbal. * Verbal communication: The use of spoken words to convey a verbal message. Examples include a conversation, speech or presentation, or talking over the phone. * Written communication: Sending messages, instructions, or details in written form, such as letters, emails, reports, manuals, memos, etc. * Non-verbal communication: Includes facial expressions, gestures, body language, touch, and even appearance. The way you listen, look, move, and react can say something. If a person has strong interpersonal communication skills, they are likely to be effective at communicating points, messages, feelings, and thoughts to others. Not only is this important in daily interactions with family, friends, and even strangers, it’s also an essential skill in the workplace. Examples of interpersonal skills These are some examples of skills that are important in the workplace and help ensure the success of employees, their colleagues, and the business as a whole: > Active listening · Verbal communication · Written communication · Business etiquette · Adaptability · Flexibility · Willingness to change · Lifelong learner · Honest · Ethical · Personable · Empathetic · Positive · Optimistic · Encouraging · Professional · Accountable · Reliable · Resourceful · Team player · Supportive · Collaborative · Hard working · Motivated If you’re applying or interviewing for a job, using some of these words on your resume or cover letter can help show the hiring manager you have strong interpersonal skills and can be successful at their organization. Elements of interpersonal communication So, what does it mean to be an effective communicator? In theory, there are a few elements of interpersonal communication that help ensure this: People There needs to be at least two people to have effective communication - the communicator and the receiver of the message. Knowing how many people will be receiving the message can help the communicator create a message that reaches everyone. Message Regardless of how you communicate your message, whether verbally, in an email, or through body language and gestures, there needs to be something you’re trying to communicate. Noise Noise is anything that interferes with this message, keeping it from being understood by the receiver or causing it to be inaccurate. It could be physical, such as music or a TV, or psychological, like the receiver being distracted. It could also be something the sender does, including too much jargon or language barriers. The communicator should try to eliminate as much noise as possible. Channel This is how the communication actually occurs. It’s important to communicate on a channel that will resonate with or reach your audience. Examples include face-to-face, emails, social media, internet web pages, smartphones, newspapers, or others. Context Have you ever read an email or text message and misunderstood what the person was saying or how they were saying it? Context is how the message is interpreted, and strong interpersonal communication skills can help ensure the message is interpreted the way you intended, especially if sent via written channels. Feedback This is the response to the message. If there is none, the communication was not effective. If the receiver gets the message, that’s positive feedback. Most communications should be open to receiving feedback, either in the form of a brainstorm, answers to questions, or conversation. Why interpersonal communication is key in the workplace Having strong interpersonal communication skills is key to a company’s success, as well as for your own success, development, and productivity. Effective interpersonal communication can make the following easier: Solving problems When you’re able to communicate and discuss problems, brainstorm, listen to ideas and respect other peoples’ views, coming up with and implementing solutions becomes more effective and easier. Conflict resolution In addition to solving problems, those with effective interpersonal communication skills are able to resolve conflicts between themselves and colleagues quickly and efficiently, without causing more problems. Meeting business goals When leaders and managers can communicate effectively and efficiently, employees will likely feel they have clear direction and goals to help them accomplish their tasks. Aligning employees with the company’s mission and goals, and ensuring they have the tools to get there, can help prevent them from feeling frustrated, disconnected, or overwhelmed. Transparency Lack of transparency can also lead to frustration and disconnect with employees. When a leader or manager uses good interpersonal communication skills, they can improve trust in the workplace, as well as overall business communication. Openness to change Change can be scary, especially for employees who have been with the company or in a role for an extended period of time. When leaders can communicate effectively and ensure employees understand the change, they may feel more supported and aligned with the organization’s needs. Improving culture Interpersonal communication can help improve relationships between colleagues, which helps ensure an organization has a strong company culture. The workplace becomes more positive and supportive instead of negative or overridden with conflict. In turn, this supports employee productivity and satisfaction. Avoiding miscommunication The more effectively you’re able to communicate, the less likely it is that your employees will misunderstand or believe or spread gossip or rumors. A leader’s verbal, written, and non-verbal communication skills all play a role in communicating successfully. Building relationships Communication can be powerful and can lead to meaningful and personal relationships within the workplace. Not only is this important for leaders and their teams, but also for colleagues. Healthy relationships can make employees more productive and help them work better together. Effective management and leadership To be an effective and successful leader, you must have interpersonal communication skills. You’ll be expected to help your team solve problems, meet goals, and communicate properly. You’ll also be responsible for fostering a positive and transparent culture with your team. The ability to speak and write well can help make this easier. Career development Communication skills are often listed as a key skill to have when applying for a job or promotion. If you seek to advance your career, these skills are necessary. > With about 27% of the U.S. workforce [https://smallbiztrends.com/2021/11/remote-work-statistics.html] today working remotely, interpersonal communications skills are more important than ever before. And it’s estimated that more than 36 million Americans will be remote by 2025, so this trend will continue to grow. Being able to communicate and be productive through technology, such as video conferencing, phone calls, emails, and online chat, helps ensure success with remote teams. Generally, those with strong communication skills often make effective leaders and managers. They can be trusted to have positive outcomes at work, are pleasant to work with, and maintain relationships with colleagues. They also know how to motivate people while also encouraging success. This not only makes you a more likable person in the workplace, but also more appealing as a new hire. How to improve communication in the workplace You don’t have to be a leader or manager to help encourage improved communication with your colleagues. The more effective you are at communicating, the more successful you will all be. If there’s room for improvement, there are a few things you can do to overcome those weaknesses and better the situation: Know your audience Not everyone communicates the same, and not everyone can be communicated to in the same way. For example, some team members may be very direct, while others may be timider. Some focus on relationships and culture, while others are focused on outcomes and goals. It’s important that your message is understood, so knowing how to share that message with those on your team can ensure it’s effectively shared. Check your body language When you’re having a conversation, the receiver is likely watching your face and body language. This is especially true on video conferencing when you can only see the person’s face. Sit or stand with good posture, uncross your arms, and make eye contact. While someone is speaking, occasionally nod your head to show you’re engaged and listening. Meet Meeting with your team on a regular basis can help ensure transparency and foster a culture where employees feel they can openly communicate with each other and with you. You should also meet 1:1 with others when possible to give them an opportunity to speak with you. Give feedback When possible, give positive feedback (both verbally and written) to your team. Encourage them when they are doing well and meeting goals. And when providing criticism or negative feedback, do so in a constructive way. When possible, make it a private conversation. Do not criticize, but instead offer suggestions for how to improve next time. Take notes and send recaps When in meetings or talking with someone else, take notes on what was discussed. Be sure to include next steps and timelines or deadlines when possible. Then, share this information via email so it’s documented and all parties involved have the same information. Train If you can, schedule communication training sessions. Bring in an expert to help your team learn how to communicate effectively and improve their skills. Overall, it’s important to regularly ask yourself these questions related to your communication: 1. Who do you perceive yourself to be? 2. How do others perceive you? 3. How do you want others to perceive you, if #1 and #2 differ? Knowing how you perceive yourself and want to be perceived, as well as how others perceive you, can help point you in the direction of improving your communication and reaching your communication goals.
